Yeah, so, things have been a bit tough lately. I had to say something, you know? After the match, the feeling was just too much. So I wrote a thing, about how people should speak up when it’s hard, not only when it’s good. It’s important someone says it.
Then me and the gaffer, Thomas, we had a talk. Johan was there too. It was a good conversation, we kept it between us. They reminded me I’m still learning to be a leader. And that’s true, sometimes you get it wrong. I’ve done a lot for the club I feel, on the pitch and off it, and they said they see that too. But keeping stuff inside the building is usually better.
I feel bad for our fans, honestly. I apologized to them, because we are the ones playing. It’s on us. I am the first to say that. Seeing them upset after Bournemouth, it hurts. We gotta be better. All of us, together, working harder and staying quiet through the noise. That’s the only way it gets easier.
The club has had a lot of change upstairs. New people in charge now for a while. It’s a different time. Maybe everyone is still figuring things out.
About that other thing, the cup? Thomas definitely didn’t mean anything by it. Who would even do that on purpose? Not winning makes everyone look for stories, I guess.
My main thing is we gotta stick together. Richy and Pedro, they showed they feel the same. We just gotta face this, all of us. It’s the only choice we really have.
It’s weird being the one everyone looks at. I try to set an example, but the passion, it can come out wrong. You want so badly for things to be right, and sometimes the words just… spill out before you think where they should go. That’s on me. But the feeling behind them, that wasn’t a mistake.
You hear things, you know? Rumors in the dressing room about what’s next, who might come or go. It creates a kind of fog. My job is to pull everyone through that, to focus on the next match only. But when the direction from above feels quiet, that fog gets thicker. Players aren’t robots. We notice the silence.
I saw the picture with the fans arguing after Bournemouth. Micky and Pedro, they were just listening. It’s hard to look at. They give everything, we all do. But when results are bad, everything cracks. The connection feels thin. That’s what scared me most, not the losing but that space opening between us and the people in the stands. That can’t happen.
Thomas is under it too, of course. His coffee cup, it’s a funny story but it shows how every tiny thing gets magnified. We lose and suddenly everything is a sign, a symbol of something wrong. The truth is simpler: we’re just not playing well enough. It’s not about cups or lies, it’s about tackles won and passes made. We have to return to that basic truth, somehow.
So where from here? You put your head down. The talk with Thomas and Johan, it was necessary. It clears the air in private. Now we have to clear it on the pitch, publicly. There’s no other fix. I believe this group can, I really do. But belief is just a word until you show it. Starting Monday, we show it.
